setting
Index was once a small and close-knit community, but the town located on the western side of Washington state has grown in recent years beyond anyone's expectations. It is the ideal place for those who work in Seattle but can't afford the city's high real estate prices, and for others the natural beauty attracts them to the town. And Index truly is a beautiful place - surrounded by thick evergreen trees, tall mountains and glistening rivers and lakes. While weather is typically rainy with overcast skies even this does nothing to take away from the beauty of the town, and it is only highlighted further when the heavy snow graces the town and caps the mountains in winter. To many, Index would seem like a paradise. And yet lurking beneath this visual beauty there is more to this town than anyone might ever imagine...

Current Time in Index, Washington:
rules
PLAYBYS: Sims from the games Sims 2, 3 and 4 are used to visually represent player’s original characters (no characters from within the franchise are allowed). But, you do not need these games to join and roleplay! If you wish, you can post a thread in our out of character / general forum and list as many physical details about your character as you wish. The members of Index will happily try and make a character for you, and you can choose which one you feel best fits your vision.

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 [Private] The Wolf and the Raven - Page 3

[Private] The Wolf and the Raven

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Re: [Private] The Wolf and the Raven

Michelle Hawke | Human; Citizen

Posted on Thu Jun 22, 2017 12:33 am

I started to remove the protein bars (which were probably hard as rocks, I hadn’t even checked an expiration date) when he started answering my question. It wasn’t an answer I expected or could even begin to understand. Was he still mad? And I don’t mean angry - I mean had this actually caused him to break? Was it from some kind of dream he had down there? But no, fuck my life, because of my own situation, my own short life being exposed to more extraordinary than ordinary, I believed him, even if cautiously. I wanted to ask questions but I didn’t even know what to ask.

And that’s why I was supposed to leave you there? There’s not any better fucking option? What the hell is she, then? A ghost? I stepped over a root and sat down again with my back against a tree. Physically I was exhausted, still. Mentally, I was… well there wasn’t really an appropriate word for that. Emotionally, apparently, I was a train wreck. Caught between wanting him to be insane and not. Neither option at this point was okay. I couldn’t accept either option and apparently I refused to. My cheeks already burned but I felt more warm tears streaming down.

You know, clearly I don’t get it. I’m not a fucking wolf, I’m not even sure I even qualify as an adult, but for fucks’ sake don’t you think… My words couldn’t keep up with my mind. Tangent after tangent, me wishing he would have told me more from the beginning, to me wanting him to understand that he was important to me to realizing that it was shit timing to say any of this and finally I stopped caring and I forced myself to look at him as the wheel of my mind spun and whatever the needle landed on was what was coming out.

I know you hate me but goddammit I have like, two fucking people in this world I care about and I don’t know how in any fucking world you’d think I’d just leave you there. The tears didn’t stop but I looked away, away from him and away from the water. You can’t fault me for not knowing but I’m not sure it would change a fucking thing I did.

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Re: [Private] The Wolf and the Raven

Vincent Sawyer Byrne | Wolf; Pack Master/Alpha

Posted on Fri Jun 23, 2017 10:48 am

I watched her, empty minded. Maybe not completely empty, because as I watched her remove some kind of energy bar from the bag my stomach tensed. Maybe I should have been hungry, but I wasn't, not even close. The thought of eating anything made my mouth fill up with saliva, and not in the way it might if I was anticipating a delicious steak dinner. No, this was in a way that was preparing me for vomit. So I swallowed it back, and tore my eyes away. Looking away wasn't going to help. Nothing was going to settle my stomach. I was caught in a never-ending feeling of physical anxiety. My brain was bouncing between too much information, and complete emptiness, but my body was constant, because I guess it understood what was happening better than I did.

Yes! I looked towards her and glared... I mean... No... This time I looked away. I mean... I don't know... She'd opened up to me, but even the two times she'd said something about her situation, it was obvious she was holding back the details. I wouldn't say I was trying to do the same thing, I guess maybe we were alike in some ways. Because she knew about my situation, but just like her, I hadn't provided her any details. I hadn't given her any explanation to help her understand. And maybe that was wrong... Maybe she needed to understand. Maybe that was the only way to make sure she'd stay away from me for good. It was easy to sleep in a bed if you suspected there was a monster hiding underneath of it... Seeing that monster was the only way to make sure you'd never sleep in it again.

I could feel how cold I was being towards her. There were moments when I wasn't, but the amount of time I'd spent actually being cold towards her was far greater than the amount of time I hadn't. I'd thought it was intentional, but I wasn't even sure if it was anymore. I didn't hate her, quite the fucking opposite, actually. But I wasn't exactly myself right now either. I could feel myself getting angry over it, too. And once that anger slipped in, it snowballed. I didn't exactly know why, but I had a feeling it was because the angrier I felt, the less I felt other things. Worse things. And I'm one of them? You're kidding... I never asked you to care, you shouldn't care. I told you to stay away from me, I told you I didn't want to see you again, and you fucking defied me. Should I have compelled it into your brain? For fucks sake Michelle do you not remember what happened last time. You're fucked up. You're probably the most fucked up chick I've ever met in my life, but God, I never thought you were fucking stupid until now. The more cruel I was, the more angry with myself I became. It made it easier. It made it a lot easier.

My eyes widened and I forced myself to get closer to her. There is something seriously fucking wrong with me and if you're not careful you're gonna end up in my fucking web. Who knows, maybe you're already in it. Maybe you want to be. Maybe this is all a part of your fucked up plan to get home, and that's fucking scary Raven, that's scary as fuck because it makes you a shittier person than I am for trying to make me the one that takes you there. If The Ancient finds out what you just did she's going to kill you, and that's not gonna be on her fucking conscience, it's gonna be on mine. Actions have fucking consequences, even if you think they're the right actions. The look on my face was as bitter and hateful as I could make it, but I knew that there was no hate in my eyes. Whether she noticed that or not, it only made me push harder.

And any that die because of what you've just done, that's all going to be on your conscience. The life of one, my life doesn't fucking matter compared to hundreds, it doesn't fucking compare to thousands. Don't you get that? It wasn't her fault, she didn't know. But she had said that even if she did she wasn't sure she'd change anything. And that really did make her a shitty fucking person. I wasn't saying that I was a saint, but on some level I at least realized how fucking important it was that I be removed from everyone and everything. Lilith isn't a ghost. She's fucking death. She's Apocalypse, and I have done every fucking thing I can to keep her poison in me, to keep her poison from spreading. Is that what you want? Do you want years of effort to go to waste because you couldn't let me die? Do you want to undo every fucking good choice I've made? I can't believe it, I won't believe that you're such a shitty person that even if you knew the fucking details, you'd have still saved me. I can't believe that, I fucking can't.

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Re: [Private] The Wolf and the Raven

Michelle Hawke | Human; Citizen

Posted on Wed Jul 05, 2017 6:46 am

For the first time ever I was pissed, seriously pissed. Fuck giving him the benefit of the doubt, fuck assuming he was trying to protect me by being a dickhead. Fuck the fact that I knew he didn’t understand the full extent to what was going on with me. You don’t get to decide who I care about. It isn’t a fucking button, dude. You can’t turn it off and you don’t get to. And the way he looked, the way he spoke, I really fucking wished that it was just a fucking button and my give a fuck would be gone. And all this time, ever since the incident, I had wanted him to think exactly what he had said, that I’d been using him to fix my problem, but now, I had to prove him wrong and not because I wanted him to know, but just to counter his fucking argument. Fucking stupid, man.

You think… you think I came to your house wearing almost fucking nothing so I could get you to kill me? You think I actually sat, listening to what that ancient twat had done to you and thought… OOOHHH I know how to piss her off! I’ll save him!?!?! At some point everything in my hands had fallen to the ground and I’d kicked the backpack as hard as I could, doing nothing but getting dirt on it and all the water bottles tumbled out. I don’t actually fucking want to die, goddammit. I can’t… fuck this is like, the last fucking thing that matters right now. I’d been practically yelling but my tone came down with the last part.

Why don’t you fucking tell me the details? Like, fuck, Vin, how long has this shit been going on? Are you fucking sure this was even the best fucking way to deal with this? If she’s so fucking powerful I’m sure you being at the bottom of a lake would be the least of her fucking worries. Why fucking suffer? I shook my head, and looked at his shirt, some twisted irony kicking in. I doubt you have to be the fucking Jesus in this story. There’s gotta be another fucking way. I sat down with my back against a tree and started at the ground, realizing that I’d been avoiding looking at him more now than when he was pitiful and naked.

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