setting
Index was once a small and close-knit community, but the town located on the western side of Washington state has grown in recent years beyond anyone's expectations. It is the ideal place for those who work in Seattle but can't afford the city's high real estate prices, and for others the natural beauty attracts them to the town. And Index truly is a beautiful place - surrounded by thick evergreen trees, tall mountains and glistening rivers and lakes. While weather is typically rainy with overcast skies even this does nothing to take away from the beauty of the town, and it is only highlighted further when the heavy snow graces the town and caps the mountains in winter. To many, Index would seem like a paradise. And yet lurking beneath this visual beauty there is more to this town than anyone might ever imagine...

Current Time in Index, Washington:
rules
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 [Private] Wine Coolers - Page 3

[Private] Wine Coolers

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Re: [Private] Wine Coolers

Arden Rowe | Wolf; Spiritual Leader

Posted on Mon Aug 24, 2015 6:50 pm

As you can imagine, anger was the predominate emotion that I felt when I was around Onyx, but when he asked me one simple question, that anger and frustration was momentarily replaced by pity. He would probably be angry if he realized that I pitied him, but it wasn't really something I could control. The fact that he couldn't differentiate between real hatred and dislike just showed how fucked up everything was. I disliked loads of things, him included, but real hatred. That was something I could gladly say I'd only felt a few times in my entire lifetime. Did he not understand that I did not see him as my enemy? Just because I thought he sucked as a leader did not mean that I was against him. For me it wasn't black or white, it wasn't "if you're not with me then you're against me."

Onyx, I meant what I said about not hating you. I'm not gonna lie, I don't like you, but there's a very big difference between hate and dislike. I feel no malice towards you, and I don't consider you my enemy. The fact that I felt that that needed to be clarified just showed how we were on completely different pages.

With my groceries put away, I poured a glass of jack for myself and put the bottle back into the liquor cabinet. Then I sat in the living room. I didn't really want to be near Onyx - I could even smell the distinct odor of cigarettes wafting off him and seeping into the furniture. I briefly wished that I had picked up some Febreeze while at the store - perhaps a nice floral scent, or maybe Landon would prefer something less feminine like those ones that smell like freshly washed sheets. Bitches love the smell of freshly washed sheets.

Look, I train hard and I encourage my packmates to do the same. I understand why you asked us to do that - hell, we've fought vampires together. But you can't skulk around wallowing in self-pity and expect those that follow you not to do the same. I don't dislike your decisions, I dislike your attitude.

At first I'd been uncomfortable with the situation, but I'd come to enjoy the bluntness of the conversation. Onyx had asked me to speak frankly and had promised there wouldn't be repercussions. Under other circumstances, I might be more conservative in what I said, but at this point I was going to say whatever I wanted, because why the hell not?

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Re: [Private] Wine Coolers

Vincent Sawyer Byrne | Wolf; Pack Master/Alpha

Posted on Sat Aug 29, 2015 4:55 pm

She didn't even know me? Fuck why did I care so much if she liked me anyway? It had nothing to do with the fact that she was hot, or at least I thought it had nothing to do with that. The truth was, I couldn't be sure. I couldn't control anything my fucking dick told me. It was hard to differentiate between what was honest in my heart and head, and what my dick was trying to say. But wasn't there a survey at some point? That proved attractive people have an easier time in life than unattractive people? Shit maybe I was just another statistic, desiring her approval because she was blessed with good fucking genetics...

I was starting to feel pissed off. I had promised there would be no repercussions from her speaking honestly but her idea of me was all wrong. It was so fucking wrong... I got up from my seat and walked over to her, knowing damn well that what I was about to do was entirely fueled by fucking rage. It was stupid, it was a stupid fucking move and I knew it was stupid even as I was preparing to do it. My desire to prove her fucking wrong was too god damned strong, and I couldn't stop myself...

Wolves don't scar.

It was those three words that kept pushing me forward as I reached for the hem of my shirt and began pulling it up, revealing the abundant slashes and scarring tissue across my body, of which was not there the last time I saw her. I wasn't looking for sympathy, fuck that was the last thing I wanted from her or anyone, I just wanted to prove to her that there was more to it than ''not wanting to be a leader''. If that was my only problem, I'd be fucking golden, but it went so much fucking deeper than that. There's so much you don't know. I don't wallow in self pity. Maybe you see self pity, fuck I can get that, it's easy to misinterpret something when all you can go by is a few things I've done and my expression and body language. I get that, I'm not condemning you for that, because hell, I'd probably think the same. But it's not self pity, it's not just a hatred of leading. If those were my only problems, I'd be happy as a clam. But nothing I've said or done, and the way I've acted or come across, none of that has anything to do with what you think they do.

She would ask what happened, how I scarred, when, where, who was involved. Maybe she wouldn't, but I was betting she would, and I wasn't sure if I could give her the truth. Putting trust in my wolves got me in trouble last fucking time, and I learned my lesson.

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Re: [Private] Wine Coolers

Arden Rowe | Wolf; Spiritual Leader

Posted on Sun Aug 30, 2015 4:00 pm

Onyx being angry hadn't really concerned me, at least not at first. He was pretty much always angry, in my opinion. He'd told me there wouldn't be repercussions and I hadn't doubted it, at least not until he stood up. I wasn't really sure what to think as he approached me except that maybe he wouldn't keep his word and I was about to receive some kind of beat down, which was not a good thought at all. I mean, surprisingly, I'd never really made Onyx mad enough for him to resort to violence, but I really couldn't produce another reason for why he was acting in the way that he was.

As his fingers tugged at his shirt hem, I opened my mouth to ask what in the actual fuck was happening, but as he pulled the shirt up, words left me. I know what you're thinking, Onyx removed his shirt and I was just gaping at his chest, but it wasn't his chest I was looking at. His flesh was marred with more scars than I could count. As far as I was concerned, this wasn't even possible. I had a lot of scars that I'd gotten as a human, the most notable being those on my knees. They were the smallest, but they represented the most. But I hadn't gotten any new ones since I'd been turned, no matter how badly I was beat up. Even Landon had noticed this strange occurrence. I'd brushed it off as luck, but it wasn't. Wolves didn't scar, or at least they weren't supposed to, and as the alpha Onyx was much more powerful than I. And these were slashes that were almost gruesome despite having healed.

I recovered from my silence to release a stream of curses, Holy fucking shit! The fuck happened? My mind was working slower than my mouth, unfortunately. I didn't really understand the gravity of what Onyx was trying to tell me until after I'd managed to sound like a total idiot, but really there were no words that I could find to explain how bizarre it was. Why was Onyx telling me this anyway? I hadn't thought he cared, and yet he was now letting me in on some shit that was definitely NOT common knowledge among the pack, and as far as I was concerned Onyx just thought I was another bitchy warrior who obviously had no value to him. And no matter how hard I tried I could not think of anything that would explain what he was showing me. I'd never heard of anything being capable of this - not vamps or mages or anything. I don't understand was all I could think to say.

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Re: [Private] Wine Coolers

Vincent Sawyer Byrne | Wolf; Pack Master/Alpha

Posted on Tue Sep 01, 2015 3:49 am

Her reaction had me immediately dropping my shirt. Fuck no I wasn't self-conscious about it. Why the fuck would I be? They were only giant recently healed thus unsightly gashes all over my fucking skin. One, yeah maybe it would have made me look tough, maybe it'd fucking add character, I don't fucking know. But I had more than one, I was fucking covered in them. It wasn't like having a scar on your knee that you got as a kid from falling off your bike. It wasn't just a couple scars with a couple funny or interesting stories. All of them told the same fucking tale, that fucked up shit had happened, shit I didn't want to talk about, but inevitably people would fucking ask. Shit I'd never be able to escape because physically, they'd live on, and everyone would want to fucking know.

I told you. It goes fucking deeper, and I don't just mean skin deep either. I spoke calmly, but my expression said it all. My expression showed every ounce of misery and discomfort that I wouldn't allow my voice to sound. And with that, I sat down. Silver, we tend to stay away from it because it's a fucking brutal substance, as I'm sure you know. As long as it's touching us, it fucking burns and singes and we can't heal until it's removed, but you already know that. When you coat a blade in that shit, in one particular kind of situation, it can leave nasty scars... I paused and took a breath and exhaled out my nose before leaning back in my seat, my knee already rapidly bouncing up and down as I crossed my arms and ran my thumb over my fingers to crack my knuckles. Those weeks I was gone. When Oveyx was running shit. I left because something is coming. If I stop now, everything would go back to the way it was. But if I kept talking, then there was a chance this news would spread. Did I trust her? Fuck no I didn't. I didn't know her well enough to trust her. But would the news spreading be a bad thing? Or could it be good? Hell, maybe she could keep a secret, maybe I could trust her, but there was no way of knowing...

I'm not gonna get into it, I'm just going to say some shit has been happening, dark shit. Some really fucking evil shit. This isn't just... nests of vampires, hell I'd take twenty nests of ancients over the shit I'm talking about, it's that bad. But this evil shit has been happening, I've kept it from you, from the rest, and I'd like to keep it that way. Because as much as you may not believe me, I've kept it from you all to protect you. To allow you all to have your freedom. To allow you all to pass me at the dive and mutter nasty comments under your breath before heading over to play a game of pool with your beer. As much as people may not believe it, I do want every one of you to have your freedom, just as much as I desire mine...

I left to find answers. I want nothing more than to solve this evil problem and pretend it never happened. I'd like to take it with me to my grave if you get what I'm saying... I shifted in my seat and wondered how much of what I was saying was genuinely true. Yeah, I had kept it from them to protect them. And I would continue keeping from them to protect them. Even now, I wasn't telling her the truth about Lilith. Only one other knew the absolute truth. But maybe I was keeping it from them to protect me too... Something went wrong, and I ended up somewhere I really didn't want to be. These people... Or rather... These things did horrible shit to me. The image of that tube in my mouth and the blood working it's way up to my mouth flashed into my mind and I winced as I tried to push it away. The entire time I was gone, I was tortured... And when it ended they gave me something...

I nervously rubbed my jaw, my eyes now unable to look at her for too long as they darted around the room, desperately searching for something to focus on. Anything but what my mouth and mind were doing. It was a flash drive... I didn't know if she was a loyal follower of Odin. From what she said earlier, it made it seem like maybe she wasn't, but not everything was as it seems... When I got back, and opened up the files... It was becoming so hard to speak, my throat was going dry and no amount of alcohol... No amount of water... No amount of anything was going to fix in. The only thing that would, would be my silence, but that wasn't in the cards for me today. There were videos of Odin. He was uh... He was conspiring with fangers, and not just the kind you see on the street, these ones were different. They were high up on the power chain, that much was apparent. Nothing he gave any of us when he was alive was authentic. His entire being was built on a foundation of lies Olympia. The freedom he provided all of us alongside safety was only possible because of the deals he had made with fangers. He did horrible fucking things to gain the love and respect of everyone. He only desired to die a legend, all he wanted was fucking fame. These videos prove all of it. He committed murder against our kind. My throat tensed. He killed our own with his bare hands to achieve it. He killed our own for these fucking fangers. It was sick. Everything on these videos was fucking sick.

My voice trailed off as what I had just done began to sink in. I knew it was wrong. I knew I shouldn't have told her. But maybe a part of me wanted to tell people. Maybe a part of me wanted to destroy their image of Odin simply so I could improve on their image of me. Fuck it was selfish, I knew it was. I didn't want any of them to know this. Deep down I didn't want to destroy them like that. It would, it would absolutely fucking destroy them, and I would die as the guy that just couldn't let them be fucking happy. Is that what I wanted to be?

I shouldn't have told you any of this. I shouldn-... I shouldn't have said a word. I leaned forward and propped my elbows on my knees as my face went into my hands. I raised my head as my hands slid down over my mouth. Fuck... I knew I would regret every word. So why the fuck did I do it? Why did I say anything at all...

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Re: [Private] Wine Coolers

Arden Rowe | Wolf; Spiritual Leader

Posted on Tue Sep 01, 2015 11:43 am

I felt like I should pinch myself because what was happening just wasn't fucking possible. It's difficult to even put into words what I was feeling. It was like that feeling you get when you're falling asleep but you wake up in a jolt? I'd always figured there was a reason for Onyx's piss-poor attitude, but I'd never in a million-billion-trillion years imagined that it was something beyond his own resentment and self-pity.

When he'd recovered his scars I'd found myself staring at nothing, but when I finally looked at his face the confusion I'd been feeling just got worse. It was a look of misery so deep that the empathy I felt almost made me burst into tears myself. I'd only seen a look like that once before in my entire life, and that was when my mother died. That look had been on my father's face right before his whole life fell into a hole of despair and constant punishment. He was right when he said it was more than skin deep, I could see that on his face, plain as day.

I put my face into my hands and then pushed my fingers through my hair before finally resting my chin on my palms and focusing my eyes on the glass on the table in front of me. I thought he was done with the scars, but he just kept talking and every word was worse than the last and I could practically feel the pain radiating from him in the same way I could smell the cigarettes on his skin and clothing. I'd never hated my connection to emotion as much as I did then. I felt like I was wading through a haze, but the moment he began to express his regret I found myself snapping out of it.

No. I hesitated then, unsure of what to say. I mean... uh, I don't know why you told me all that, but I'm not going to, uh, tell anyone... or anything. I still didn't know what exactly he expected, or wanted, from me. We weren't the best of friends, and I could see he'd decided to make himself into a martyr for the pack, which wasn't exactly something I agreed with but I could see that he thought he was doing it for the pack which wasn't really something I could say was bad as much as stupid.

And this... problem. Are you just gonna solve it alone? I mean, isn't there anyway I- uh, we- well, the pack... can help you? I still didn't really know what we were up against, but we were a pack - a team of sorts. It was our job to come together and support him, which was difficult to do considering that no one really knew what was happening. There was a reason why no wolves listened to Onyx and it was because between him and Odin, the pack had clearly been led into a state of disillusionment by its own leaders. Even I'd been disillusioned and still kind of was. How are you protecting the pack by lying to it?

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