setting
Index was once a small and close-knit community, but the town located on the western side of Washington state has grown in recent years beyond anyone's expectations. It is the ideal place for those who work in Seattle but can't afford the city's high real estate prices, and for others the natural beauty attracts them to the town. And Index truly is a beautiful place - surrounded by thick evergreen trees, tall mountains and glistening rivers and lakes. While weather is typically rainy with overcast skies even this does nothing to take away from the beauty of the town, and it is only highlighted further when the heavy snow graces the town and caps the mountains in winter. To many, Index would seem like a paradise. And yet lurking beneath this visual beauty there is more to this town than anyone might ever imagine...

Current Time in Index, Washington:
rules
PLAYBYS: Sims from the games Sims 2, 3 and 4 are used to visually represent player’s original characters (no characters from within the franchise are allowed). But, you do not need these games to join and roleplay! If you wish, you can post a thread in our out of character / general forum and list as many physical details about your character as you wish. The members of Index will happily try and make a character for you, and you can choose which one you feel best fits your vision.

AVATARS: Avatars should display your characters face clearly and should be at least 200 pixels tall, and 200 pixels wide.

THREADING & POSTING: When threading with multiple characters, it is important that you post only when it is your turn. This can be acheived by taking note of who has posted before you, and remember you are to always post after them. If you were the thread starter, then it is your turn after the final person has joined your thread.

When creating a thread you are required to place a tag before the title. Here are a list of types of thread you can create and how to tag each one:

[Open] Anyone is welcome to join your thread, with no limit on the number of characters.
[Open - #] Anyone is welcome to join your thread, but there is a limit on the number of characters who can join. Replace the # with how many extra characters you will allow to join your thread.
[Private] Only specific characters can join your thread.
[Closed] This tag should be used for threads that only involve your character.

ACTIVITY: To keep threads moving, people are encouraged to post within three days when it is their turn. If you do not post within three days, and you have not asked people to wait for you, it is possible you will be skipped. Keep in mind this is just a suggestion. While we'd love for everyone to be active every day, we understand that real life and other hobbies are just as important, if not more. We want you to be active because you want to be, not because a rule is telling you to be.

MATURITY RATING: Public threads should all be PG. If roleplayers above the age of 18 wish to post content that could be could be considered graphic then it should be hidden from view using the [hide] [/hide] code, which will enable only those in the threads and administrators to view the content.


 [Private] Something to Choke on - Page 7

[Private] Something to Choke on

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Re: [Private] Something to Choke on

Helios Tallon | Army of God; Chief

Posted on Sat Apr 04, 2015 5:37 pm

My eyes widened at what he said next, and for the first time with Lenny I felt a little insulted. Did he really think that low of me that he would assume such negative things? Did he really think I was that ignorant? I knew his preferences were not a disease, of course they were not. It was not something that spread from person to person. The more I thought about it the more I wondered when he would stop seeing a priest when he looked at me. That had to have been the only explanation. Sometimes I felt like he viewed me like I was a cartoon, so black and white and specifically one way, without any gray areas or opinions of my own that weren't influenced by my job. That was not how I was, not at all.

I went quiet, afraid to say anything more and unintentionally cause anymore harm to the night. Instead I reached for my glass and took a very large drink then placed it back on the table, suddenly wishing I had something a little more potent to sip on. I could be. I replied, trying not to laugh at the ridiculousness of it. Well I could be, he did not know that. Was there something about me that could not pass as a believable exotic dancer?

I let them talk, realizing that the news had impacted Avery just as much as it had me. Well, I am not sure if it matters or not, but this does not change anything. When I realized the truth, yes it felt like very big news but in the end who you choose to lust after and love is no more important to me than what kind of ice cream you prefer. I just needed a bit of time to process it, that was all. I admitted, wishing more than anything we could go back to before I had opened my mouth about the subject.

I took another drink from my glass and my eyes darted between Avery and Lenny before finally landing on my reflection in the glass. Is it my glasses? Is that what makes me an unconvincing exotic dancer?

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Re: [Private] Something to Choke on

Avery Marx |

Posted on Sat Apr 04, 2015 6:30 pm

I sat up a little straighter in my chair when Lenny spoke, wondering why on earth he'd have jumped to thinking something like that. Shock was a normal reaction to totally unexpected news and I would definitely qualify this as wholly unexpected. But that didn't mean I had a problem with it. Not in the sense that I thought it was wrong of him to feel like he felt or be attracted to whomever he wanted. My thoughts were a total mess but that didn't stop me from feeling the urge to reassure my friend. Infect? Really? If I had absolutely no problem with it when I thought you were full on gay then why would I have that kind of problem with this? It was what I'd done that I had a problem with. All the things I'd done. But why hadn't he ever said anything.

The glass of wine I nursed was fast becoming as dear to me as a first born child. It was my life preserver in a sea of unwanted news and revelations. It was magic too, obviously. It made wine disappear like nobodies business. Look at that, a third glass already half empty. I nodded at what Lenny said, accepting that it was obvious he knew I wasn't a lesbian. Allegra was though. Why was I thinking of Allegra? What if she was actually bi too and I'd never known?! No,no, I was sure she'd definitely told me she was gay. I smiled at Helios' reaction to Lenny's statement, wondering what kind of priest thought he could be an exotic dancer?

Lenny's word made me feel bad... but the also made me feel a little angry. Could he really think of nothing, nothing that would make me upset and him being bisexual instead of gay. Gay, as in liking men. Gay as in not being in any way affected by a housemate that walks around in her underwear? Oh God, maybe I was a slut. It was just so... so frustrating and I couldn't hold it in anymore. It's not what you are or who you like Lenny. It's just... did you not think it was weird. The way I acted? The way I dressed. Or rather didn't. I did those thing because I thought it was harmless, because I thought you were gay and- I mean the bath for God's sake! I stopped, realizing that my outburst hadn't just been heard by Lenny. I looked at Helios, eyes widening and heat crawling up my face. Excuse me, I need to... I didn't finish and just pushed back from the table, fleeing to the bathroom like Helios had done earlier.

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Re: [Private] Something to Choke on

Lenny Tronconi | Army of God; Hunter

Posted on Sat Apr 04, 2015 7:01 pm

I groaned, wishing I could take back what I'd said. Quote Begin Noo, I said sorry, I didn't meant to say that.. fuck.. I know that.Quote End I cringed, not knowing what else to say. I didn't want to go into that it had just been stupidity on my part, old memories coming back to haunt me, or think about those memories at all. I just sat there glumly, wondering what the fuck we were going to do next.

Just when I thought I was going to spend the rest of my evening depressed and angry and bitter, Helios spoke up. My mouth opened in surprise, and then I closed it, but the expression was still visible on my face. Out of the two, Avery and Helios, I'd expected him to react more extremely. I nodded somberly, but managed to break into a small smile. Quote Begin Yeah, okay.Quote End I glanced up from my nail picking to Helios, Quote Begin ...thank you.Quote End

Hi next questions had me sputtering with surprised laughter, struggling to suppress it. I didn't know what was more shockingly funny - the thought of Helios being an exotic dancer, or the fact he seemed to care so much about it. Either way, it did a great job of cheering me up and distracting me from Avery's sad state. Quote Begin What? No, your glasses don't have anything to do with it.Quote End I shook my head - that was obviously stupid. Quote Begin I just... I dunno, you..... dancing.... Quote End Maybe it was stupid, but I just couldn't imagine it. Helios dancing? Fuck, it was.... so, so fucked up. Quote Begin Can you even dance? It's just.. I mean, no offence, I just.. I just can't imagine you dancing, it's so weird.Quote End I struggled to stop my grin spreading, biting my lip to suppress laughter. Whenever I tried to imagine it I got a weird image of Helios shaking his body, more like a seizure then actual dancing.

The distraction didn't work for long, though. The grin fell off my face when Avery addressed me. I just stared at her, disbelieving and then stunned by the things she was bringing up - things I hadn't thought would even come up after what just happened. It just hadn't occurred to me. Yes, I'd thought Avery's behavior was weird at the beginning, but I'd put it down to her being a model or just very comfortable with herself. I could feel my cheeks start to heat up and I was so stunned, I was stunned speechless. I didn't have anything to say as Avery rushed out.

Quote Begin Fuck.Quote End I breathed after a pause of silence that seemed to stretch forever. I glanced to Helios, floundering and not knowing what to do. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. I glared down at the table, fighting the pricking sensation at my eyes. It wasn't fair. Everything was beginning to seem like my fault, but that wasn't fucking fair. Quote Begin What the fuck? How can I fuck up when I don't even do anything?!Quote End I ranted, not sure whether I was talking to Helios or just venting, but I glanced up to him for some sort of answer. I put my head into my hands, fingers threading through my hair as I stared blankly. Besides anger, concern and worry for Avery thrummed through my head. What if this caused one of her emotional problem things? Quote Begin Should I go after her?Quote End I asked Helios, quietly and suddenly, lowering my hands so they were fidgeting in my lap again. I wanted to go and make sure she was okay, to go and say something... but I didn't know what to say, and honestly it seemed like she didn't want to see me right then.

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Re: [Private] Something to Choke on

Helios Tallon | Army of God; Chief

Posted on Sun Apr 05, 2015 12:29 pm

Awkward was not the right word to describe the situation right now. It was not a powerful enough word. I was unbelievably uncomfortable, a feeling that only increased the more I thought about how this was the first time I was meeting Avery. The things she must think of me after this. Her opinion of me was probably incredibly poor, and I slumped in my chair the more I thought about it. I was normally so cautious and in control over my emotions, but this night seemed to be the exception. Maybe it was the pressure of trying to make a good impression that caused it, it did not matter unfortunately. No matter how much I thought about it, there was no way to take back what I had started.

I was happy to see that I'd managed to do something right however, and immediately fixed my poor posture. If I could get him to laugh then perhaps the night could be salvaged. Now my concern was solely on Avery, who seemed to have taken the news far worse than I had. I laughed at his response, feeling a bit out of place since laughter was clearly not appropriate at the current moment in time. So it was not my glasses, it was just... Apparently I did not seem like the kind of person who could dance. I was not insulted at his honesty this time, but I was a little concerned that maybe I came off as stiff. I could be loose... I really could...

I turned my head away from the two of them when the words came pouring out of Avery. I felt like this was something I was not supposed to hear, like they needed time alone to discuss it, and the only way I could think to give them that time was by letting my eyes focus on something on the other side of the room. A bath?! What did she mean by the bath?! I had definitely opened up a spoiled can of worms, and this was something only time could clean up. Jokes and lighthearted banter would not salvage the night, not now. I had no idea the severity until that word escaped her, ''bath''. I was beginning to understand why the news had such a large impact on her and guilt started flooding back in.

When she excused herself the only sound that accompanied us at the table was the sound of our own breathing until Lenny broke that silence, his choice word cut through the deafening sound like a razor blade. I let my eyes turn to him, and what I said next fell out of me with no control. Bath? I placed my face in my hands and pushed my glasses up to wipe my eyes before letting my hands fall to my sides with a sigh. Maybe it is just that Lenny, not doing anything can be just as damaging as doing something. I admitted, trying to avoid sounding like I was preaching to him. In this case, it was his choice to not warn her of his preferences before things were revealed, very physical things.

I would maybe give her a minute to herself to gather her thoughts, and then yes, you probably should. I am sure she is not too angry with you, she is probably just embarrassed. I tried to reassure him, choosing my wording very carefully because I indeed did not know her well enough to say for certain.

Should I... I started with my finger pointed towards the door, Maybe I should leave you two to sort this out?

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Re: [Private] Something to Choke on

Avery Marx |

Posted on Sun Apr 05, 2015 3:49 pm

OOC Message
I didn't set out for this to be an outpost but I feel it naturally progressed to being one. Hope that's okay!


Once I had the door to the bathroom shut behind me I felt like I could breath a little easier. I leaned against it, my body sagging with relief now that I didn't feel like I was suffocating under tension. The room had felt to me like it still carried the echo of what Lenny had revealed, like I wouldn't be able to stop thinking about it until I left. But even though it was easier to process everything now that I was alone I found I couldn't think of anything but what he had said. I'd just made such a fool of myself. Maybe it was shallow of me but I really hated that I'd done that. All I wanted was to be taken seriously and not only gain respect from other but to have also earner it. How could Lenny have respected me with the way I'd behaved the whole time I'd known him? It didn't seem possible that he could have.

I walked over to the sink and looked in the mirror hanging above it, frowning at my reflection. Embarrassment from the scene I'd just made was creeping in now too on top of everything else. I felt so... anxious. The idea of going back out there was daunting to the point that it made my hands clammy. I felt like a failure for it too, ashamed that I was obviously so incapable of handling tough situations that hiding in a bathroom was a better option to me. It made me feel sick. 

But more than anything I just felt exhausted. A headache throbbed at my temples and I couldn't even take anything for it. A history like mine had left me with a deep seated fear of mixing alcohol with any form of medication, even something like ibuprofen. Maybe I'd just be better off going to bed. Part of me wanted to just slip up the stares quietly, avoid the two men in the kitchen after how I'd acted. But I couldn't, I wouldn't be that much of a coward. I pulled my hair loosed and ran my hands through it, then pinched some color back into my cheeks. Delaying was pointless so I just didn't. Instead I walked back to the door and pulled it open, heading back to the main room. 

I- I hesitated briefly, taking a deep breath and forging on. I think it might be best if I went to bed. I've a headache and would probably be incapable of being a halfway decent hostess. Helios, I'm terribly sorry for reacting like I did and if that left a bad impression. I paused again, steeling myself to look at Lenny. Lenny... I'm just really sorry. For everything. For not knowing and assuming. There was so much more I could say but I needed time to process it all. Maybe wait for the awkwardness I felt to fade. With a weak smile I turned and went for the stairs, keeping my steps calm and unhurried until I got the the upper hall and rushed for my room.

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